The greatest tribute to the dead is not grief but gratitude. Thornton Wilder
I created The Grieving Heart® because
of personal loss and my journey of grief is changing me in unexpected ways. I am learning that loving relationships continue
long after the last breath. Death does not end my care and love for those who have gone before me, but transforms my love--even
as my day-to-day life is forever changed by the loss.
I am learning to love in separation: I must let go, but
not entirely. I do not need to break the loving bond with my dead parents, but I do need to redefine the nature of that bond.
Rather than separating me from my parents, their deaths challenge me to maintain a meaningful connection to them.
My parents were not perfect but I know they did the very best they could with what they had. As I learn to move forward
with my life, I want to embrace all that my parents meant to me--not as something fixed in time or memory, but as two people
who retain the capacity to love me in ways I cannot yet imagine. I'll close with a poem:
I'm There Inside Your Heart
©2002 Abbey Press
Right now I'm in a different place,
And though we seem apart,
I'm closer than I ever was...
I'm there inside
I'm with you when you greet each day
And while the sun shines bright,
I'm there to share
the sunsets, too...
I'm with you every night.
I'm with you when the times are good,
To share a laugh
And if a tear should start to fall...
I'll still be there for you.
And when that day arrives
That we no longer are apart,
I'll smile and hold you close to me...
Forever in my heart.
Go to introduction
of the next section: Grief Takes Turns (How to Help Grievers)