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Grievers Helping Grievers

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The world breaks every one and afterward many are strong at the broken places.
Ernest Hemingway, Farewell to Arms
 
 

At first, there is no gift in grief. When someone we love dies we are too aware of our own sadness to think about the sorrow of others. Yet, despite our pain, grief awakens us to the suffering of others. Sooner than we think, we will learn of people with grief like ours and reach out to them with the gift of understanding.

Circumstances can throw us together in unexpected ways. If we have a chance to talk, we will recognize each other's suffering and will be strengthened in this new relationship. I had the opportunity to listen to a friend share grief feelings that were newer than mine just three months after my mother died. We discovered that we were not alone in our sadness and this insight was oddly uplifting.

Grief teaches us that we must slow down, simplify and turn inward to open ourselves to new understanding of the world around us. Grief also teaches us that the only time we have is now to let people know we care about them. In our journey of grief, we find that giving and receiving love is the greatest healer of all.

As people around us experience their own tragedies, we can offer comfort and hope. When that day of reaching out arrives, we will be reminded of how far we have traveled on our own journey of grief. The death of a loved one is part of the human story that enables us to love and support each other through compassion.

Here is a portion of an E-mail from my wise online friend Marty, author of Grief Healing
, a comprehensive Internet resource: Loss is a part of living, after all, and sooner or later all of us will be faced with it. As Deidre Felton once wrote, "Sorrow is a matter of taking turns. This year, it's yours. Next year, it might be you setting the table for someone else who feels that they cannot cope."


Source for this article:

Hickman, Martha Whitmore. Healing After Loss: Daily Meditations for Working Through Grief. New York: Perennial Press, An Imprint of HarperCollins Publishers, 1994, April 27 entry.

Makes a thoughtful gift for a grieving friend or loved one. At $10.00 a copy, it is affordable for most. It consistently receives five-star reader reviews at online bookstores. This is the book that I turned to every day during the first year after Mom's death.


Go to next page: Everything Has Changed

The Grieving Heart is getting a new home...
 
Grief has no timetable, but the launch of a new website does: August 1, 2019.                                                                     
 
The updated design will be easy to use, secure and mobile-friendly.
Please visit again. Thank you!                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          

                                                
My E-mail:

Christine (at) The Grieving Heart (dot) info 

A Word About E-mail: One way to decrease SPAM caused by Internet bots is to deactivate the live address link. You can still contact me by typing this address into your own e-mail program using @, a period, and no spaces, the standard e-mail format. Thank you.

 
Note to Visitors:
 
I read and respond to grief email at the end of each month when I update this site. If you need a more timely response, please visit a well moderated grief healing discussion group. It is free to use and requires registration to participate. I am not part of this group, but certified grief counselors are there to help, support and comfort grievers and those who love them. Because the counselors lost funding for the site, they are grateful for voluntary donations.
 
 
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How complicated and individual mending is,
the time required for healing
cannot be measured against any fixed calendar
.
Mary Jane Moffat
 
© Copyright 2008 - 2019 Christine Jette.
All rights reserved.