Tonight
all the hells of young grief have opened up again;
the
mad words, the bitter resentment, the fluttering in the stomach,
the
nightmare reality, the wallowed-in tears.
For
grief, nothing stays put.
One keeps emerging
from a phase, but it always recurs.
Round and
round. Everything repeats.
Am I going in circles,
or dare I hope I am on a spiral?
A Grief Observed, C. S. Lewis
For
more thoughts on the changing seasons, please visit The First Time Around.
The following ideas honor the dead any time
of the year and you can do the activities with children:
One of the best ways to teach children that we respect the dead is to visit a well-kept cemetery. This can be a pleasant
and meaningful family outing, especially during the fall and winter seasons, because all of nature is in repose as it awaits
the renewal of spring.
Think about the relationship between
the changing seasons and the cycles of our own lives: We are born, we bloom, we mature and we die to be born again into Spirit.
Life renews itself. The symbolism of spring, summer, autumn and winter, as it relates to the circle of life, can be helpful
to children because it is gentle and valid. (Omit Spirit if it is incompatible with your belief system. All of nature
is born and all of nature dies. The imagery will still work.)
If
you live in the Cincinnati-TriState area, take a stroll through Spring Grove Cemetery and Arboretum, a tranquil place that honors life in a beautiful setting.
Visit the graves of your own family members. Place seasonal flowers or wreaths by the headstones. Share family stories
with your children about their grandparents, great-grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins -- to remember their lives and
how they influenced your life.
Instead of the ordinary
bedtime routine, pull out your old family albums and look at them with your children. This usually inspires some good family
stories that you might forget to tell them otherwise.
Your
heart will tell you what you need to do to grieve. Follow inner guidance.